Where there is no Mentor
By James McElrath
Picture this: It’s the pre-Internet era. My wife and I—young, hopeful, and a little naive—said “yes” to God and set out for the mission field. Experienced missionaries poured their hearts into preparing us for anything and everything—Bible teaching, language learning, culture acquisition, even how to stay healthy in remote places. Every new missionary, ourselves included, was armed with a shiny copy of “Where There Is No Doctor” by David Werner—a thick, reassuring manual that promised to guide us through everything from the common cold to emergency surgery.
But here’s the problem: Serving in large cities with healthcare readily available to us, we rarely cracked open that encyclopedia of medical wisdom. And when we did consult it to figure out some confusing symptom, the answer was always the same—a worst-case scenario ending in imminent and gruesome death! Where There Is No Doctor didn’t help us much. What we really needed—within just weeks of arriving—was a different book: Where There Is No Mentor.
The Longing for a Mentor
A mentor is a trusted guide—someone with experience who offers wisdom, direction, and encouragement. I was overwhelmed, unsure of how to lead or endure. When I heard friends joyfully describe how a pastor and a church had embraced them in their time of need, I didn’t celebrate. I sank deeper into bitterness, convinced that God had forgotten us.
Maybe you’ve been there. Maybe you’re there now—desperate for a copy of Where There Is No Mentor. That book hasn’t been written yet. But maybe our story—of longing, frustration, and God’s surprising provision—can remind you of this truth: “The God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, establish, strengthen, and support you.” (1 Peter 5:10a, CSB)
Repentance Before Mentorship
So how did God begin to change my heart? It turns out, what I needed most wasn't a mentor. It was repentance. Like Elijah in 1 Kings 19:10, I had started to believe I was the only one left, the only one faithful, and that God had let me down. I believed I had worked hard and tried to be obedient, and therefore deserved better from God.
But lies only lose their power when we confront them with truth. When we tell God He has failed us, we are, in effect, calling Him a liar—especially when He says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” (2 Cor. 12:9)
God’s Word and Spirit: The First Mentors
The first and greatest source of mentoring God provided—and still provides—is His Word and His Spirit. Scripture rebuked, corrected, and began to retrain me (2 Tim. 3:16–17). God applied both conviction and comfort to my heart, as the foundations I thought were rock turned out to be sand. He began a deep renovation project in my heart, burning away what was spiritually toxic (Jer. 23:29) and rebuilding on His grace.
I had not expected this, had not asked for it—and certainly hadn’t given Him permission. But He did it anyway, in love. And with time, He began to surround me with mentors—both living and dead.
Dead Mentors: Wisdom from the Ages
A friend reminded me that I wasn’t as alone as I thought. Faithful men and women from past generations had left their wisdom in books, journals, letters, and sermons. Their stories were records of how God had sustained them through trials, doubts, and suffering. As pastors, there is no circumstance we could ever face that God’s people have not faced before, albeit in various times and places. Why should we always reinvent the wheel?
The struggles we face are not new. Others have already walked this path with faith. The spiritually rich writings of saints who ran their race well (Heb. 12:1–2) can fill us with fresh hope in God’s unchanging faithfulness. Socrates put it wisely: “Employ your time in improving yourself by other men's writings, so that you shall gain easily what others have labored hard for.” (Plato, Apology, 22a–b)
Living Mentors: God's Ongoing Provision
God also provides living, breathing mentors.
Start with this expectation: God has someone for you. Don’t assume you’re on your own. Look for pastors in similar ministry settings. Reach out. Phone calls, Zoom meetings, and coffee conversations can become lifelines of wisdom and encouragement.
Sometimes mentors find us. Other times we must go looking. After prayer, action is still required. Identify fellow pastors in whom you see the mature fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22–25). Invite one or two to meet and talk. Offer something tasty and don’t skimp on the good coffee! In the spirit of Proverbs 17:8, hospitality opens many doors.
If no one responds, don’t give up. Try again. Sooner or later, God will provide a mentor—or even the beginning of a pastoral cohort, a band of brothers with whom you can walk in mutual care, accountability, and encouragement (Acts 20:28).
The Need for Mutual Support
Two are better than one. No one is so strong that they never need support (Eccles. 4:9–10). God calls older believers to invest in the younger (Titus 2:6–8), and many experienced pastors are eager to pass on what they’ve learned.
These relationships don’t just bless the one being mentored, for “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” (Acts 20:35) Discovering and investing in mentoring relationships brings joy and encouragement to both. As mentors help us press on toward the goal (Phil. 3:14) they are reminded and renewed in seeing that their life’s journey still has value and fruitful impact.
So for the pastor—or the missionary, or the weary servant of God—who feels like there’s no mentor, hear this:
God’s promises still stand. His Word is your reliable guide. His Spirit is your faithful counselor. And His people—past and present—can be His voice of wisdom and comfort.
Whether live or virtual, near or far, past or present, no pastor is without a mentor and no pastor need ever walk alone.
James “Jamie” McElrath
Served with his wife as missionaries in the North Africa and the Middle East for 23 years, He is entering his 10th year as pastor of Olivet Baptist Church in Honolulu, HI.