By Brian Croft

My wife and I promised each of our children when they turned 13 years old, they would get to take a special trip with one of us. My son with me and each of my daughters with my wife. The purpose of these trips is to first have fun and enjoy each other’s company, which is why they each get to pick the destination (must be within a day’s drive) and determine much of the agenda.

“Then came a mother’s prayer, and some of the words of that prayer we shall never forget, even when our hair is grey.  I remember, on one occasion, her praying thus: “Now, Lord if my children go on in their sins, it will not be from ignorance that they perish, and my soul must bear a swift witness against them at the day of judgment if they lay not hold of Christ.”- Charles Spurgeon 

When we as pastors are attacked or criticized by those in the church, we have the option to defend ourselves. We can fight back. We can argue our case. In most cases, it is a “lose-lose” battle any time a pastor’s wife embraces the task to defend her husband. Therefore, what is she to do? Here are 3 suggestions.

How do you teach a group of 4-6 year old kids what a pastor is and does? This is something any pastor should be able to do, so pastor, how would you go about this? This article represents my efforts to explain a pastor’s task in the form of props I brought with me to class for the kids to see, touch, and ask questions.

As common as miscarriage is, it is stunning how many well-meaning people have no idea how to best care for those who have lost an unborn baby. Here are a few tips for those interested in knowing helpful ways to care for a couple who have just experienced this loss and be sensitive to the pain they feel.

A while back The Gospel Coalition published an article that I wrote, where I tried to answer the challenging question: “Is My Child a Christian?”  As you can imagine, it has created quite a buzz. Here is an excerpt of the full article. There is also a link to the full article on Gospel Coalition.

I started along a broken and bumpy road on January 28. Frankly, I knew this road was on the horizon but never wanted to travel there. It came with a phone call. The voice was calm but the words came like an avalanche, throwing me into a state of shock and despair. My oldest daughter was dead. Her struggle with drug addiction, that had robbed her of so much, had taken her life. The news took my breath away.

Based on the emails, notes, and phone calls I continue to get, trust me…your pastor needs encouragement.  He needs to know that what he does week in and week out means something to God as well as those for whom he labors.

Marriage is hard enough, but add ministry into the mix and you have a recipe for a potential mess.  My work with pastors and their families cause me to see a lot of the messiness that exists in pastors’ homes.  There’s plenty of the same mess in my own home.  The combined stress of marriage in ministry is a unique situation that demands an intentionality to keep a marriage or ministry from imploding.

“Daddy, why does our church hate us” it takes it to an entirely different level of concern.  What is a pastor to do?  I have several ideas, but I will start with this one:

The rigors of tri-vocational ministry had left me deeply weary with a fatigue that I realized would not be remedied by a few days off. I needed to step away completely for the purpose of rest and a needed “gut check” in several areas of my life. I took the entire month of July off.  Unplugged from all ministry, including all social media.

Pastors, seize every opportunity to go to the hospital on these occasions to see new born babies.  It is some of the only times you go to the hospital to celebrate.