By Kellye Carmack

God’s love is greater than any person or church can show you. Even the most meaningful human gifts pale in comparison to what He has for you. Let me encourage you to take a few moments to rest in His love for you. Meditate on who He is as your Father and Creator. Ask Him to show you how much He loves you.

By Glenna Marshall

From where I sit, most of my ministry as a pastor’s wife has been unseen. If you asked church members what it is that I actually do, they’d likely reply with the things that are visible: I play the piano every Sunday, I volunteer at our weekly outreach program to kids in our community, I get the bulletins ready each week. Simple, visible stuff.

By Gillian Marchenko

I’ve battled mental illness for the tenure of my husband’s ministry career. I support him in his endeavors and participate in various ministries at church. I facilitate Bible studies, greet people on Sunday mornings, assist with children’s church, and am involved in discipleship relationships. Except when I’m depressed. Then I’m suddenly absent.

By Kellye Carmack

How will you get up on Sunday morning and serve your church when you are hurting? God is a rescuer, He wants to rescue you. Before you decide to give up, call out to Him for help. He can give you strength and endurance to faithfully serve in the hardest of places.

By Glenna Marshall

Throughout my seventeen years as a ministry wife, I’ve handled my discouragement in some unhelpful ways. At times, I’ve withdrawn from my church, ranted inwardly, and succumbed to bitterness. None of those actions have served to rouse my affections for Christ or His Bride, so I’ve had to reexamine what it really means to cast my cares on the Lord.

By Kellye Carmack

A friend recently shared with me that she had grown complacent in her prayer life. Where she once felt a passion and excitement for prayer she now felt tired and unmotivated. Knowing that prayer is pivotal for her ministry and personal growth she was desperate to get out of what she called a “prayerless rut”. “What do you do,” she asked, “when you don’t feel like praying?”

By Glenna Marshall

Our church ministry was tough from day one. We had no idea what we were doing, and we had walked into quite a difficult situation. What followed were a dozen broken years. It seemed that everything we touched failed, that every hope for the church was met with resistance and criticism, and I struggled with chronic loneliness.

By DeAnna Gibson

I remember ministry before Autism. Mostly well-curated, carefully unveiled at my own discretion, I hid most flaws and inconsistencies better left unseen. It would take a few years beyond my son’s diagnosis to begin relinquishing my need to be seen in a certain light as a mom and ministry wife, and to willingly be on display for Jesus and His purposes in me and my son.

By Cara Croft

The teenage years are messy. They are messy physically and emotionally. Teenagers want to have their own style, their own friends, and their own opinions. It is a time where they are gravitating towards friends and away from us. It is a time when they are trying to figure out who they are and what they believe apart from us. It is a time filled with fear, anxiety, and turmoil for all of us. This is why it is messy.

By Glenna Marshall

What we get, in parenting, are human children who struggle with sinfulness and obedience just like we do. It’s humbling to be the mom in the grocery store whose kid is wailing with all his might while demanding the Spiderman toy you refused to buy. You can feel every eye on you as you try to diffuse the situation without melting into the floor. Even worse if it’s a church sanctuary instead of a grocery store!

By Kellye Carmack

After years of trying, my husband and I were still childless, and I was dragging myself through another Mother’s Day without children. I left that day feeling both the grief of my empty womb and the love of God through His people.

Churches have varying expectations of their ministry wives. And dear ministry wife—because you’re just one person, you’re going to fail to meet the myriad of expectations that an entire congregation of people have for you. The fear of becoming a failure in their eyes or of somehow damaging your husband’s ministry can weaken your resolve to set healthy boundaries for you and your family.

“It feels like heavy weights pressing down on my shoulders.”

“I would describe it like rope tied tight around my chest making it hard to breathe.”

“To me it is like rocks just sitting in my stomach.”

As I talk with pastor’s wives these are some statements I hear when they are describing the weight of expectations being placed upon them. Honestly, these are some of the words I have used to describe the same weight I often experience.

Relief has come in the form of not having to do the same crazy Sunday morning ritual. You know, the routine of trying to get kids dressed, fed, and out the door in time to make it to church. The routine of sitting in the pew alone while our husbands are preaching. The routine of fielding all of the pre and post church questions and concerns. The routine of facing the weekly expectations. The routine of conflicts and heated members meetings. The disruption to this routine feels relieving.